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Vulpix.
21 years young.
a blog of memories and things to remember.
26.11.08
Hmm.


Ever had multiple dreams and hopes come true at once only to find that none are as satisfying as you once expected?
This is the air I breathe. The life I live currently.
Everyday appears to me as one long endless day. I feel nothing, I see nothing. And all the time, I'm looking back on previous days, feeling as though they occurred a month ago. I'm living through the recognition and struggle of either having changed or having had friends change from how they used to be. I don't know who i am at the moment, and I sure as hell don't know who i can count on anymore. People change..but what if you are the one who changed and the change has left you more confused about who you are than ever before?
Suppose I'm meant to be a lonely homebody. Lack of friends. Lack of life. I don't even know. Thinking about it depresses me slightly so involving myself ridiculously deep in novels, music and long walks are how i'm existing.
Is it even possible that I'm missing school already? I don't miss the stress or the books or the monotony but I'm starting to see that life without nothing is not all it's cracked up to be. At school it's not so obvious that you lack friends, that you have enemies. At school the fact you're a complete and utter misfit isn't so vivid.
I don't know what to do. They say to never lose hope.
And I don't. But it doesn't take away the sadness right now.

0 fat astronauts